Finding beauty at obvious disconnection. She is planes above me, in the stratosphere. It is true, a dangerous woman, with beauty, culture, intelligence and an attitude of confidence. Speaking japanese at the table with friends, feeling fat at the end of another eating contest. I feel fat, slow, lethargic. Where is all of my team spirit? Get back on the wagon. Exercise, train. Gym, bass. Get great at all things. Voice. Writing. Learn.
Buy books and read them. Learn about theory. Learn about the world. Challenge the brain the intellect. It is dangerous to allow oneself to vegetate for even a few moments. It becomes comfortable. A tic. A consciousness to fall into when the rest of the body doesn't agree. Retain that natural energy. The byproduct of a productive day. We need to believe that what we are doing is right!
Do more. Be more. Swim. Write. Create. Do it. Do it.
Irony in these messages. I fell less inclined to write now than to recline and sleep. There is something disgusting in that, considering the days away. Were they the same day? We ran through sets. Dreamed up sexes. Called the shots. Had lunch and dinner over there. I stayed there last night. Laundry mishap. Feeling so stupid and dull. Come on now. Think up those genius ideas once more and actually execute them. Remember where you are and where you are headed. Be ready for it.
